The Liar: Went to a casino...report of a male who had been prowling into cars in the parking lot. First off...why does anyone ever try anything in a casino. They have more cameras there than anywhere. He's outside when we showed up after being chased by security. He proceeds to lie to me for the next 10 minutes. He kept playing the parakeet game as I like to call it. "Do you got Id on you"? "Uh oh do I have ID on me...no?" "Whats your name" "oh whats my name?" He replies. Its like no dipshit I wanna know your dogs name cause you're such an interesting guy.
Anyway we learned that in the academy......when someone is lying they will play that parakeet game...its a method of stalling while your brain can think of a lie. So then he started playing the name game with me. He gave me several different names and dates of birth. I asked what his social security number was and he gave me one.......I asked him to repeat it again (to see if he was lying...no one could remember a false number twice) He did pretty good this time but he added a couple of digits. Dispatch kept getting no record found.....finally we just arrested him for obstruction. We searched his pockets and found a car key and key fob. We started hittin that thing and a new escalade beeped right next to us. I ran the plate and came back to a female registered owner. We look inside the car and there is a male's wallet sitting on the ground.....oh how convenient....open it up and the guy has his ID. He had warrants....he got to go to the grey bar motel.
The fast drive: Big party in a neighboring city. Some drunkards started fighting with local officers there. One of them called a code 2. We got to drive fast......very fast. Probably the funnest code runs I've ever had cause it was just one straight stretch. I will refrain from commenting on how fast we were actually goin but I remember hitting the brakes one time because there was a bump coming up in the road and I remember thinking that I really didn't want to get this car airborn at all....not joking.
PLEASE READ ON IF YOU DRONED OUT CAUSE THIS IS THE BEST PART:
As the title suggest to this post....holy mother of god! We were all chillin having breakfast at our usual spot when they closed the air for us (restricted the channel for emergency traffic only). Suicidal subject with a knife........we go flying out there. Get to the door and this guys roomate was trying to get the door open for us but the dude had layed down in front of the door. We get the door halfway open and he is lying there trying to kick the door shut. We can't see his hands and he is stabbing himself in the abdomen..thrust thrust thrust...and growling at us. Verbal commands...verbal commands....nothing. Finally my partner tazered him and that seemed to help...the guy pulls the knife out. HOLY SHIT....it wasn't a knife it was an 8 inch dual pronged serving fork for your bbq. Guy starts fighting with us the whole time and kicking at me. We finally subdued him and got him in cuffs. The aid crew came in....the guy didn't look good...eyes rolling back into his head......we got him on a gurney and had to strap him down cause he started fighting again. Then he died.....they had to shock him right there on the table and everythin...doing cpr and the full 9 yards. They revived him and ran him down south to harborview. I don't know if he made it or not but that was a fun call. I was so happy I had just bought this industrial strength aerosol spray disinfectant for my cuffs.
cant wait to go back to work tonight.
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